I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I think people are normalizing furries
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
