That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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