So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
