why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
