My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
