Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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