Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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