I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
