You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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