Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
