but the lizard people decide everything anyway
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
