It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
