Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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