she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
