We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Randomize
