is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
