if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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