You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
