my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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