Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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