Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize