why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
