My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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