it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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