I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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