oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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