Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
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