i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
