My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
