I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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