break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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