I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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