is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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