I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
You smell like stripper and shame
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Randomize
