grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
