after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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