Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
