I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
