i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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