so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
