That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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