FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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