Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
