So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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