Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Randomize
