at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
