I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
A bitchslap is in order.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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