and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
My friends, they love my intelligence
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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