You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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