I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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