I faked an abortion last night.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
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